Monday, July 25, 2011

Summer of Fitness

Who said you're not allowed to use a blog as a way to publicly embarrass your family members?


'Member when I said my family is obsessed with working out this summer?  Well it's still going strong.  Partially because my "little" brother is always flaunting his newly formed hott bod.

Which basically means that he walks around like this all the time:


Guys, my own mother asked if this was photoshopped.  It is not!  This is actually what little "Puke" looks like all day 'err day.  I would be more surprised to see him with a shirt on.  Needless to say, holy motivation!  I look like Flabby McGee every time I stand next to the guy.

Now you may be wondering where the heck this picture was taken.  And I will tell you, because it sort of features me conquering a fear.  It is in our empty pool as we were filling it.

When we first got our pool redone, it was all super slippery and like a slip and slide all the time.  So my little brothers were out there having fun for like 20 minutes and I decide to slide around and on my very first slide around, I got to the deepest part of the pool and my finger and big toe got stuck under the little filter-y thing at the very bottom.  And to get them off I had to rip off skin and toenail and it was a bloody nasty mess.  And if there is one thing I do NOT handle well, it is my foot bleeding.

It probably originated in that moment, but I FREAK OUT if my feet start bleeding.  I like insist on someone taking care of me and bandaging the wound even though I hate to think that they are then looking at my feet because you have to remember that they are probably the absolute ugliest part of my body.

And yet, I insist on wearing flip flops.



Anyways fitness. I'm about to go bench 95 POUNDS and run 8 miles.  One of those was a lie.  Or maybe both.  But I can bench 95 lbs.

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Photo Phun (get it?)

I'm getting a new phone soon (like, it's coming in the mail kind of soon).  And so I was going through all my old photos on this phone and deciding to trash or keep them.  But some of them were just too good not to share.


So it's time for a round of......

Why the Heck do I have this Picture Anyway?

And that's the end of that.  

Monday, July 18, 2011

Fire in the Hole

Baby-less and feeling oddly like an empty-nester, I write what I meant to for the last week or so, but was too preoccupied with babies (and OK maybe I've read 4 Harry Potter books in the last 5 days) to tell you about.

So picture this: you are wrestling babies, and you are doing a good job of it because they are giggling and clamoring for your attention and chasing you around as you say, "I'm gonna get you!" in a really creepy voice which should probably scar a 1.5 year old and a 3 year old for life now that you think of it, and then you get tired.  Because baby-wrestling is a little exhausting.  They are just about the cutest 30-40 pound weights you ever lifted, though.

And the babies get distracted in the bathroom and decide they both want to brush their teeth at the same time with the same toothbrush and they start screaming at each other and you until you decide that no one can brush their teeth and then they are both screaming, so you try and pick them both up and hold them so that they still know that you love them.

But then in the middle of one of those moments where you think, "gosh darn it I really want of these, but not for a long, long time" you hear a strange zapping noise out by the pool.  And as you look outside you see smoke.  So you drop the babies and really look outside and you see flames.  And you realize there is a small electrical fire involving two extension chords and a broom in your back yard.

So being a twenty-year-old with really no guts when it comes to small disasters, you yell in your alarmed, but still rather calm voice, "Dad! Dad, there's a fire in the backyard by the pool, and it's an electrical fire."  And your father, who is much better than you at saving the day, does a bit of quick thinking and turns of all the electricity in the house and then puts the small fire out with the hose.

And you are left with this:



And two extension chords that are now useless that your hero-dad has already thrown away and you can't take a picture of.

And you think, "My life is awesome."






And also you google it and you learn that you can use baking soda or fire extinguishers to put out electrical fires.  But a lot of baking soda so you should probably get a fire extinguisher because they work on grease fires too.


The End.

Friday, July 8, 2011

Welcome to Weirdsville.

OK, let me begin by saying I don't know how Moms do it.  I've been sort of the next best thing to mom since Sunday to my two nephews (okay well maybe my mom has been more of a mom to them, but....) and let me tell you it is pretty much impossible to feel like a normal person and to be all child-rearing-y all the time.  Granted a 20 year old like myself probably doesn't have the patience required to simultaneously watch a 3 year old and a 18 month old (they are to the day, a year and a half apart - yikes).

The point of this whole thing was - holy free birth control!  If you're wondering what I won't be doing for at least another 4 years, it's having a baby.

The other day I was making these
and I was all dressed in a skirt and chasing after babies and also barefoot in the kitchen and I thought, "The picture of domesticity"

Mine did not turn out that pretty for the record.  They are cookie dough truffles from here.  Redonkulously easy to make and similarly delicious.

..

.....

Sorry I was drooling over the thought of eating cookie dough right now.

The real real point of this whole thing is that I have hardly left home in the last few days except to go to the gym.  Because, you know, the forced-surrogate-mom-hood.  Not that I don't enjoy it.  It's just that I've actually been around these guys since last Monday. as in still June.

Oh my tangents.  (to be read like "Oh my goodness" except well, you get it)

The gym.  Okay back to the real story.  On Dayday (let's call it that because I have no concept of days in this summer haze thing I am in), we had a massive break in our water line which caused us to turn our water off for several hours as we tried to locate and fix it.  Meanwhile, I, being smelly and in need of an excuse to get my rather rotund rear off the couch for something besides baby-chasing and eating, decided to go to the gym.

My parents got me gym membership for the summer (subtle, aren't they) and it is a nice gym and we had no shower and they have showers which are significantly better than the showers I used during my entire freshman year of college, so I took my own towel, shampoo, and razor to the gym.  Can you say classy?  (Also, can you say run-on?)

I used to make fun of people who showered and got like ready for the day in the gym before I went to college and lost my fear of showering in places in that are not my home (I realize that makes me sound ... bad but it's just that showers are weird stalls in dorms).  But then I became one of those people and now I think they are cool.  Isn't that how it goes?

Also, I'm still not as bad as the lady who spent two hours curling her hair in the gym locker room.

But I did blow dry my hair.  So not by much.


I hope no one (aka my parents) took offense to this post, but I meant it out of love?  And also no one reads this blog in my house (except me of course, because you have to make sure you don't sound like too much of a dweeb ..... dweeb?) so who cares.

Yeah, I'm going to call this one.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

The 4th of Jooh Lie

Happy Independence Day everyone!  It is over, but America is still independent, so there is still reason to celebrate.  

I spent the weekend celebrating as follows:

Saturday I helped my sister sell her cute accessories and clothes.  schtuff like this: 

Then her family and I went to the fireworks show in Provo and one of my nephews FREAKED out. "We should probably go home now guys" through tears is both adorable and sad.  

Sunday I drove 8 hours from UT to home in a car with 2 babies.  Make that 9 hours.  Babies tend to slow things down.  

And Monday I went to a BBQ with the fam and a bunch of friends that I have had since before I was born.  It was fun. 

Afterwards I hung out with my friends from high school and had a blast.  You know when you know people really well and you are just weird around them if you want to be weird and they know you, so it's okay?  Well On Monday night I knew about half of the people at the party I went to and I decided to just be weird anyways.  It was weird that it worked out.  I feel like people are more comfortable around people that they think are not trying to impress everyone around them.  

Fun schtuff guys.  Fun schtuff.  Also, I apologize for the lack of pictures because I haven't been able to find the charger for my camera since I moved home.  What wah.  

Anyhoo.  I'm trying to get back into bloggermode, which means I look for funny things in the day.  Which is pretty much too much to ask for on days where I have to watch my little munchkin nephews.  But I'll try.  (I know that all my loyal, billions of readers are screaming right now).  

OK time to stop while I'm ahead?

Friday, July 1, 2011

If you're wondering

why I haven't blogged even though I was all ranty and like, "I'm going to blog more" last time around, it's probably because I'm a little bit distracted by these guys:


It's pretty hard to get anything done with these guys.