For a class I took, we watched a lot of movies. Specifically Urban films, which I suppose is a film that takes place in a city. We were supposed to be analyzing the music (it was through the music department) and one of these movies was Spike Lee's "Do the Right Thing." (I will eventually get to the point, bear (bare?) with me).
There's this scene, where Spike Lee is stopping from his pizza delivery job to get some lovin from his Puerto Rican girlfriend and it's blazing blazing hot outside and he takes a piece of ice and rubs it on her neck and says, "Thank God for the neck" and then takes the cube to her lips and is like "Thank God for lips" and wipes it on her thigh and says "Thank God for thighs" and then takes it to her kneecap and I started busting up laughing because among all the sexy body parts Spike Lee chose to bring up the kneecap??!! And my class got to hear me laugh at something that's not supposed to be funny for about the billionth time. But of course after that he thanked God for more private body parts (only one movie in the whole class had breasts in it, and I chose to bring it up on my blog), and my inappropriate laughter turned into awkward/nervous laughter because that is how I handle seeing other people's naked bodies and also I have the maturity of a 12 year old when it comes to those sorts of things.
The point of all of this is: Thank God for fingernails. (Aren't you so glad I took forever to explain the context on that one?)
I spent an inordinately long time painting my fingernails last night. And I'm not even done. I would give you a tutorial, but I think you might just get the point if I say wait until the last coat is reaaaaaaalllly dry and use scotch tape and remove it immediately after you paint it.
I messed up about one thousand times, but it's really cool and architectural looking now that it's ish done.
And now, when I go to any of the three meetings I have tomorrow, my respective supervisors will not be wondering why I don't know enough about income tax in California, or why this excel graph looks exactly like the last one, because they will know that it is because I spent literally hours trying to get my fingernails to be "really cool and architectural looking" because working from home is apparently a terrible idea for me.
Which is to say, the work gets done, but only in between coats of fingernail polish.